


How to Remember Your Time in The Shire

by musicaltrash_24601



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, M/M, No happy endings, Thorin's POV, exploring characters thoughts, heehoo sadness, its a how to guide guys, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-02-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:08:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22776175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicaltrash_24601/pseuds/musicaltrash_24601
Summary: A small guide to your time in the Shire before you depart on your Quest and after you depart.
Relationships: Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield, if you squint
Kudos: 11





	How to Remember Your Time in The Shire

Your time in the Shire is limited. You have a journey to start to reclaim your family’s home and honor. You cannot waste time being lost, but fate tells you otherwise. You end up getting lost twice before finding the little round green door that the wizard told you about.

The rest of your Company is here already, eating and making merry like the night will never end. The supposed burglar faints and you find yourself doubting his skills. He is soft and ill-suited for what you need him to do. As you finish your dinner and obtain the key to your homeland from the wizard, do not look at the hobbit. He is watching you with interest and while it is not unfamiliar to you, it might send a prickly sensation down your spine that you do not particularly enjoy. You tell Balin to give him the contract and upon reading it, he faints. This solidifies your beliefs. He is not suited for a journey of such rigor. Soft curls and delicate fingers have no place in your company. You should leave early in the morning with only a little bit of hope that perhaps the hobbit will prove you wrong. He manages to catch up, to your surprise and disdain. You did not bet on his arrival, like so many in your Company.

* * *

As your journey progresses, do not agitate the wizard. If he leaves, even for an hour, you are in a heaping amount of trouble. Encountering trolls during this journey is unlikely, but in the event that you run across them, do not let them get a hold of your burglar or your ponies. If you fail, which you should have really expected, let the hobbit talk his way out of it. It is a pleasant surprise to know that he is capable enough to save you. Gandalf will take you through the troll’s hoard. If you find a sword, do not turn it away due to previous biases. Elven swords are of good make and you really could use a sword.

As your journey continues and you lose the ponies, follow the wizard’s guidance. This will seem like a bad idea at first and will lead you to elves, which you will not like. This is a necessary evil since you will learn more about your quest and how to get back into the Mountain. In the likely event that the elves do not condone your quest, be prepared to leave while Gandalf stalls for time. If you notice the burglar hesitating, do not notice, under any circumstances, how he steels himself before continuing. That will not do you any good.

* * *

As you continue and fall in with goblins who aim to kill you, do not worry about the missing burglar. He is fine, hopefully. All will be well since he reappears to prove you wrong (which might be considered annoying, if his reasons weren’t so kind). Your old enemy the Pale Orc will return, but do not panic! Your burglar will throw himself into the battle to save you as you drift into unconsciousness. If you wake up and berate the burglar for doing something so noble, shame on you. Give him a hug to show him how appreciative you are of him doing this.

* * *

Continue on your journey into Mirkwood and pick a fight with the King of the Woodland elves because of your history. There’s no time to be imprisoned like when you’re on a quest that’s on a time limit, huh? Good thing you’ve got a burglar who rescues you. Escape through the river and do not panic when the orcs attack. This is normal for you. As you sneak into Laketown to get closer to the Mountain, make sure to not annoy your host. Also, make sure to leave behind your nephew who was injured in the orc attack at Mirkwood. He’ll love that.

You are also going slowly mad from being so close to your homeland and knowing that your family treasure is nearby, and you cannot get to it because of the evil dragon who now lives there. Isn’t that great? As you approach the Mountain, make sure to curb your aggression until you know that the dragon is slain. If the Arkenstone is nowhere to be found, don’t calmly ask your Company if they’ve seen it. Instead, accuse them of being thieves and confide in your burglar, who was originally supposed to steal it in the first place, that he is the only one you trust. He would never lie to you, with his little acorn and trustworthy demeanor.

* * *

After it is revealed that Bilbo Baggins betrayed you, threaten to throw him over the parapet! That always works when trying to win people back to your side. As five armies now gather outside your door, do not help your kin. Instead, hole up until a hallucination makes you realize that you’re an awful person and you should help them. As you go out to fight, you can play “Spot the Pale Orc and Get Ready to Kill Him”. Upon gathering your two nephews and one of your best warriors, go and fight for your honor. While you fight, try to not get injured. Of course, if you can’t avoid injury or certain death, make sure to tell the hobbit that he was incredible and if people were more like him, the world would be a better place. That’s very kind and will surely make up for everything.

* * *

As you lay on the ground, struggling to breathe, do not think about how you’re leaving everything behind: your kingdom, your family and friends, and most of all, the burglar. He will be the last thing you see before you die. Cherish that sight and thank him one last time before the breath leaves your body.

**Author's Note:**

> This was another thing for my creative writing class and I realized, after I wrote it from Bilbo's POV, that you don't see too many works from Thorin's POV, so I changed it and rewrote it completely.


End file.
